2011-01-22 21:46![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
melluransa
melluransaThe summary is "hehehe." Does this bother you? It bothers me.
“I do not want to be an imaginary friend anymore, Caerstin! I want to be with you for real!” I look around the hallway to make sure that no one is paying any attention to me. ...And this hallway is where? A school? A psycho ward?
“Bill stop thinking such nonsense! You are with me,” I whisper under my breath.
“Yeah! In your imagination!” I make my way to the bathroom and lock us in to a small stall. Ewe. Somebody forgot to flush. Must've been that sheep. Bill sulks. I put my hands on his shoulders and reach up on my tippy toes to better look him in the eyes. His arms wrap around me. He is oddly detached from this action, as if they wrapped around her of their own volition.
“Billa, I love you regardless if I am the only person who can see you like this or not. Is that not enough?...”
“I love you.”
“I love you, too.” Bill kisses my lips and I smile.
“Let’s go back home.”
“Are you going to come get me in your real body?” Bill has this special talent where he can turn himself in to the imaginary when he can not be around or near me. ...What? He is an actual person in a humans body. I'm honestly not following. And he is awesome in bed either way! Absolutely wonderful! My panties get wet at the thought. Oh, Mika! Everything is about sex to you! . . . . WAIT, he's imaginary. So she just masturbates and imagines him?
“Yes… Where do you want to go?”
“Just back to your place or something…"
__________________________________________________________
“You look really good today,” Bill comments , looking down at me as I lay in his lap.
“You’re just saying that because you want bootie.” Yeah, baby booties.
“No! I really do mean it! But sex is always good, too!” I smile and glide on top of him like whoosh!!!. “I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
__________________________________________________________
“You mean so much to me,” Bill tells me as we lay naked cuddled up in each others arms under the nice warm black fuzziness of his blankets. That's 5 adjectives, there.
“Well that’s good to know! You mean a lot to me, too!” I laugh. “Do you think it’ll ever be possible for us to go public? With you being a rock star and all?...” An imaginary rock star friend.
“I don’t know… It all depends on the future with my music..."
__________________________________________________________
Tom leaves a trail of kisses and hickies on my body from my chin to my knees as I lay there enjoying the special treatment. Bill bursts in to the room. I guess he didn’t like the fact that I was ignoring him. And WHEN were you ignoring him? You never said.... I’m just surprised he came all the way from Spain just to see why I was ignoring him! He was in Spain at some point? Thanks for telling us. “What the fuck?!” My head snaps up as Tom’s does too.
“Bill?! Ever heard of knocking?!” His face turns bright red. Tom can see Bill? Wait, so . . . . . Is Bill real now? What is going on? Is this all in Caerstin's head? Is this some complex fantasy she's daydreaming about?
“What the hell are you doing?!”
“Getting the attention that I need! Something you can’t give me!” LOL who's saying this? Tom or Caerstin? For laughs, let's imagine it's Tom.
“Tom, I can’t give you attention when I’m on tour!”
“That’s my point!”
“Get off of her,” Bill yells pulling Tom’s arm until he obeys. I have this mental image of Bill weakly tugging on Tom's arm. “You,” He points to me. “Are coming on tour with me! I’m not leaving you alone anymore!”
“I don’t want to! I want to stay here with my boyfriend!”
“I am your boyfriend!”
“No you’re not!” Ouch. Bill storms out of the house with tears in his eyes. I run after him (naked still? O_o) and eventually find him beside his car. Aww, poor Billy must have locked his keys inside. I wrap my arms around him. “I’m so sorry, Bill… I should not have said that… I’m sorry… I will go on tour with you if you want me to…” I do not want to loose Bill. I love him too much for him to leave now. And yet you still have hickies from Tom.
“I just don’t see why you cheated on me,” He sniffles while playing with a strand of grass. Wait, so they're sitting down now? NO idea as to character orientation. Oh, Mika! “I was giving you all the attention that I could… Sex when I was in town, sexting when you missed me, calling when I could, texting you when I had the time…” I love how Mika starts off with sex. She also lists sexting and texting as two things different enough to be listed separately.
“I know, I’m sorry… Do you still want to be with me?”
“Yes… I still want you to come on tour with me…” Right out of bed with one man and he still takes her back. This is completely normal to do, by the way. Fidelity be damned. Oh, Mika!
“Then I will, okay…”
“Okay…” Bill turns in my arms to hug me back. “I love you…”
“I love you, too…”
__________________________________________________________
I cuddle up to Bill as he eats his slice of pizza on the sofa watching the television. I didn't know sofas could watch television. I have been sick lately… Throwing up, loss of appetite, drowsiness, dizziness… Bill says that it is probably just motion sickness from being on the bus for so long. “You had a good concert tonight…” He smiles.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah… Bill?... Can I tell you something?... Without you freaking out…”
“Of course, angel!”
“My period is late…”
“H-how late?” Any other boy would be all awkward and say, "Erm....ok." Bill here is oddly in tune with the nuances of the female menstrual cycle.
“Four weeks after I slept with Tom kind of late…” Bill gazes in to my eyes with seriousness. Not seriously-- with seriousness.
“But we use c-condoms…” Bill has developed a stutter.
“Tom didn’t have one when he came over and I was out…” My voice breaks. Bill throws the rest of his pizza in the box. Pizza flinger!
“How could you fucking do this to me, Caerstin?! You’re such a fucking whore!"
And I agree! I don't see how being imaginary matters anymore, despite the story being titled such. Bill seems plenty real by now. I really don't know. And there is the chance this is an elaborate daydream, and Caerstin will suddenly wake at the end saying, "My! What a vivid dream! Lol, good thing it's not real!" OR MAYBE maybe Tom is imaginary too! Bill and Tom are fighting to be her imaginary sex fantasy friends! That MUST be it!
And now on to chapter 2. It begins with a new unintroduced character named Salvator. Mika Dan provides us a link to Salvator's picture. He's quite the looker. I think that Mika Dan knows him in real life and likes him, so she wrote this story putting herself with him.
Tears stream down both my cheeks (versus only one cheek) as I sit in the hotel lobby waiting on Salvator to come pick me up. Salvator is my best friend! I love him so much! After Bill and I had our fight I called him and he said that he would come get me. Bill walks in the hotels front doors with his bodyguards. I could have sworn that Bill and Caerstin were on the tour bus before, not a hotel. He has just got back from his concert and does not know that I’m leaving. His eyes find my packed bags before they find my eyes. The boy has an eye for luggage. I also imagine 2 eyeballs rolling around on the floor, searching for things.
“Babe? What are you doing?”
“I’m waiting on Salv to come get me.”
“Caerstin, it’s snowing out side… Eight inches… Where are you going to go?”
“Salv is going to take me back to his place.”
“Caerstin,” I hear Salv call with his cute amazing accent. So where is Salv from? I turn around to see him coming over with a few bags of his own. “Hey are you ready to go up to our room?”
“I thought we were going to go over to your house.”
“No, it is too snowy outside. My dad owns this hotel so we can stay here for free,” He says with a smile. Convenient. Salv is a devilish good looker, has an accent, and his dad owns a hotel. Such a rich character background!
“Okay! Lets go!” Bill grabs my arm.
“You are kidding me right?”
“Bill you called me a whore…” Salv stops dead in tracks. You know, being in a relationship with a man, being caught in bed with another man, and going to a hotel room with a third different man qualifies you for being a whore. Bill's just saying the truth.
“Excuse me? He did what?”
“Salv come on let’s just go okay? I’ll tell you about it later.” I grab Salv’s hand and lead him to the elevator. Bill follows close behind us.
“I love you,” Salv tells me unaware of Bill’s presence until we get in the elevator. I burry my face in his arm until we get out. Burry. Google tells me burry means pertaining to burrs; prickly.
“Well, this is interesting,” Bill says as Salv opens our room door. “One bed.” I'm personally not surprised. Mika Dan loves her some sex.
“Go away, Bill!” He shrugs his shoulders and goes to the room in front of us. I picture their hotel room with a little dollhouse sized room on the floor in front of them. “Why the hell is our room so close to his,” I ask Salvator once we get our things unpacked.
“I thought we could have some fun with it… Here are the tests… They are multiple choice and short answer. You have 1 hour. Keep your eyes on your own paper. If you are pregnant can we have sex?...Because um… Because of all this fighting you’ve been put through…” I laugh. Ah, Mika. "I was in a fight. Let's have sex! Sex makes everything better! Oh, and I'm pregnant too. Solution: Sex!"
“I don’t know. Maybe.” I wink and go to the bathroom. Salv follows me.
“Do you think I could help raise it?” Raise what? Seriously, raise what?
“If you want to.”
“I’m hungry… Are you hungry?” Hungry for SEX.
“Salv you’re asking too many questions…” He's only asked three. I get up and go over to the couch to sit down with the test to call Tom. What test is this? Does Salv just magically have tests on hand?
“Hello?”
“Hey… Um… I just took a pregnancy test and am about to get the results…” "Hey, whassup? I'm taking a pregnancy test! How are you?" Oh, it was a pregnancy test! I was picturing paper tests. Question: Why are there "tests" in the plural? Salv had more than one.
“I don’t want to know…” Tom's a keeper.
“Tom you’re the only guy I’ve ever slept with without a condom so you’re the only possible father.” YOU ARE NOT THE FATHER!
“If you are with that man- woman I don’t want to talk to you.” Caerstin is known to often be with transsexual people.
“I’m not with him… Oh my god, Tom… It’s positive…” Lol, I get it now. Tom was calling Bill a girl. It was confusing because we've been given no descriptions as to the characters physical traits. And lol, it's positive. Idiot-proof, just for Caerstin.
“Shit, Caerstin… Where are you?” I give him the address and the room number and then fall in to Salvator’s arms to cry. I thought Tom didn't care.
“Damn shit babe…” Damn shit. It gets everywhere.
“I am a whore, Salv,” I sob in to his chest. You've seen the light! What's strange is that sleeping around doesn't qualify you as a whore, but finding out you're pregnant does.
“You are not a whore Caerstin. Bill’s a whore… How? Bill hasn't slept around. Plus he's not pregnant. Come on. Dry your tears and let’s have some fun.”
“Salv, I’m not in the mood right now…”
“Not that kind of fun. I’m saving all of that for tonight. Let’s bang on the walls and make sex noises really loud. It will annoy the living fuck out of Bill. That is why I got us a room so close to his.” I laugh and nod my head. Salv planned all this? He's the smartest character here.
“Let’s do it! Bill has an interview it like a few minutes! There's 8 inches of snow outside. How can people come to interview him? Perfect timing!” It IS oddly convenient, isn't it? Salv puts soap in his hands as I hang up the do not disturb sign on the door knob. Salv starts working his hands as I bang on the wall. Salv is very good at washing his hands. He's working up a thick lather.... Why did he get soap again? “Oh shit! Ohhh!” Salv bangs his head on the wall as I begin jumping on the bed. He presses his eye to the peep hole and smiles at me. I like how they're having sex all over the room, simultaneously. Up against the door, AND on the bed-- at the same time!
“Oh fuck, Caerstin! Oh baby! Tighter!“ I whimper. “You like that?” Salv gives me a thumbs up telling me that Bill is out of his room.
“Oh, Salvator! You’re so much better than Bill has ever been!” It's common to mention other sexual partners during sex. Not a turn off at all.
“I’m about to come!” I yell out a little louder finishing the whole thing off. Salv falls to the floor biting his lip to keep from laughing. My phone rings and I wait to answer it.
“Hello,” I ask breathing hard.
“Open your door.”
“What? No!”
“Now!”
“This is a bad time, Bill…”
“I said now!”
“Hold on!” I hang up on him and quickly yank my clothes off. “Bill wants to see me… Take your clothes off and come on the bed,” I whisper. Salv doesn’t take any time following my orders. Soon he’s yanking and pulling as hard as he can and by the time I’m undressed he has already finished. Yanking and pulling on what? His clothes? His penis? Mika Dan doesn't clarify. I rumple my hair and throw on his shirt then begin going towards the door.
“Wait,” Salv whispers. He dips a finger in his seed and puts a trail of the white stickiness on my face and adds some to the back of my leg. Best friends are perfectly comfortable smearing their bodily fluids on each other. Eww. After he hides himself in the sheets I open the door.
“What do you want?”
Chapter End Notes:
hehe i love my sexy salvator! hes my teaddy bear!! ;3
I'm rendered speechless! This chapter beats all. That sex scene was very strange. Let's move on.
Bill studies me with his eyes working his way from my hair to my pretty pink polished toes. I read this as: "Bill plucked out his eyeballs and rolled them down my body, from my hair to my pretty pink polished toes, which was a detail we really needed to know." “Bill we’re going to be late,” Andi tells Bill. Bill pulls his eyes from me and leaves. O HAI ANDI, didn't see you there. Who are you again?
“What did he want,” Salv asks. Wow, seriously? Bill is her boyfriend, and just moments beforehand, she and Salv were purposely making loud sex sounds. Of course Bill wants to know what's going on, and she opens the door to show him Salv's cum on her face. And Salv is seriously so knuckle-headed to ask, "What did he want?" Seriously?!
“I don’t know. He just stared at me.” I remember the sperm on my face and it makes my cheeks go red. You smeared it there, you whore!
“The come thing wasn’t too much, was it?” YES. Best friends don't share bodily fluids. I look down at the ruined bed sheets.
“Nope!” *facepalm* Salvator steps closer to me and wipes his seed off my face but I grab his hand and lick it off before he can wipe it off on the sheets. There are no limits to their best friend bond. Ugh. He moans and his manhood stretches. LOL Now I'm picturing penises doing yoga! It stretches its glutes and hamstrings, proving to be as flexible as a gymnast!
“Why don’t we get cleaned up and then go get something to eat?” I smile.
“Okay! So who is going to get in first?”
“Do you think we could just have sex now? I’m really hard…” But he just came moments before. What rapid recovery time.
“Shower sex?”
“If that is okay with you…”
“Sure!” They must be friends with benefits. Caerstin really is a whore.
__________________________________________________________
“I don’t know what to get,” I complain to Salv. “Everything sounds weird.” He laughs.
“It’s just because you are pregnant.” The way the rest rant (lol rest rant) is set up, whenever you walk in to the hotel, there’s like a little lobby and then in this glass room is the rest rant. So when you first walk in you can see every one in the room because the ceiling is a mirror. What vivid and eloquent setting skills. And what was that for, Mika? Salv looks up at the ceiling and laughs. “I can see your boobies!”THERE we go. The any time Mika bothers putting in details is if it's about sex. I laugh. I laugh too.
“Wow Salv.” Bill walks in to the rest rant with another girl and Salv snickers. “What?” Bill's revenge.
“Nothing.” He moves over to my side and lets me lean in to him. His arms wrap around me and I smile. “Why do you not get some noodles? "Why do you not" is how we speak english nowadays. I know you like noodles… They have shrimp cocktails…” I love how Salvator can tell me what all is on the menu without looking at it! Like he's psychic! No wait, I forgot-- his dad owns the place. “I can have them cook you anything you want! It doesn’t even have to be on the menu!”
“Really?! That is so cool!” Salv smiles.
“Yeah, I know!”
“I want the shrimp cocktail! And champagne!”
“You can’t have champagne baby… I can get you some type of sparkling drink if you want…”
“Same thing!” Not necessarily... one has alcohol, the other doesn't. After we order our food, I get a phone call from Tom. “Hello?”
“Hey… Why do I not (Again with the resistance to make contractions. Mika, it's "why don't I.") just wait until you come home to visit? I can’t even get half way up my own driveway because of the snow…”
“That’s okay!” Salv takes his hat off and puts it on me. Oh, he's wearing a hat?
“Beautiful!” I laugh and take my bracelet and hook it around his wrist. Oh, she's wearing a bracelet? For all I know, and from what Mika has not described, they could both still be naked for all I know. Also, I love how she apparently just hung up on Tom.
“Beautiful!”
“I love you so much,” Salv says and kisses my lips. I smile.
“I love you, too!” As soon as I take the first bite of my shrimp I pause dramatically. Dramatic Chipmunk! “Where is the bathroom?”
“I’ll take you…” Salv tells the waiter that we’ll be back but he is not quick enough. I run out the front doors and go over to a bush to throw up behind it. Salv runs after me and pulls my hair back. He gently rubs circles in my back. Sickness from pregnancy is very dramatic.
“Is she okay,” I hear Bill ask. Did he just abandon that poor girl he was with?
“No,” I blurt out before throwing up again.
“You put something in the food to poison her,” Bill accuses. Because that's a common path of logic to take. You're sick? You must have been poisoned! And that's funny too, cuz Bill knows she's pregnant.
“Did not!”
“Did too!”
“She’s pregnant tightwad! That is the only thing wrong with her! Do you want to get a to go box and go back up to the room babe?” Salv is insensitive. The last thing a vomiting pregnant woman wants is the food to be put in a to go box, so she can smell it and get sick again.
“I was hoping tonight would be romantic but I ruined it,” I begin to cry. It's not the fault of the pregnancy at all.
“Babe, you didn’t ruin it… Tonight can still be romantic… Do you want to go back and eat? I can order you something else to eat…” What's with the persistant idea of keeping food around! She just puked, no food for now.
“Whatever! You don’t know how to be romantic!” Salv turns around to look at Bill.
“That’s not what she told me after she was through screaming my name!” *facepalm* Mika, it takes a lot to grate on my nerves. You're doing it.
“Both of you shut up! Bill go back to doing whatever (or whoever) the hell you were doing!” After Bill leaves, Salv helps me up off my knees and hugs me.
“What do you want to go do? Do you want to go back in and eat or do you want to go back up to our room?” Stop with the eating already. SHE IS SICK YOU MORON.
“Can we just go back to our room? I’m sleepy…” Salvator kisses my forehead.
“Of course baby!”
Maybe it's late at night, maybe I'm irritable, but this story seems especially annoying to read right now. I think I'm gonna take a break. One can only suffer so much Mika before becoming irritable.
I think it's the dialogue. It's nuts how she writes "words someone said" and then "a reaction or action someone else did" in the same sentence or with no separation. It makes you think that whoever said it did the action, or the other way around. Example: “ 'Whatever! You don’t know how to be romantic!' Salv turns around to look at Bill." So, Bill said that, but Salv is immediately mentioned instead, and it makes you think Salv said it. But Bill said it, judging from the action afterward. Bill wasn't mentioned for an entire paragraph and then he suddenly said something out of the blue and without any identification as to saying it. Yeah, that's annoying. Mika does it a lot.
When I wake up the next morning, Salvator and Tom are up whispering to each other quietly trying to not wake me up. I thought Tom wasn’t going to come up… Apparently he changed his mind. I sit up in the bed and rub my eyes. “Salv? Tom?” Tom comes over to me and brushes the hair from my forehead.
“You’re not a whore. I know a whore anywhere. And you baby are very far from a whore, you understand? Don’t let Bill tell you, you are… He doesn’t know what he’s talking about… I can’t believe you’re pregnant…”
“Hey, I told you to pull out but you’re the one with the late reactions.” Tom smirks at me.
“I’m sorry I fucked you up…” I laugh.
“Don’t tell me that yet! Wait until I am in labor!” I get up and pull back on my shorts before going to the bathroom to brush my teeth. Salvator follows behind me.
“Bill came over late last night.” I turn to face him with my toothpaste moustache. What? He’s lying. Bill does not care about me. He proved that hypothesis when he called me a whore. “He came at around 11:36 but you were passed out. He stayed up until Tom got here around 3:00.”
“Liar.”
“I’m not lying. He left you this. He wrote it here, too… I wanted to read it to make sure it was hateful or mean but he told me that if I read it I would die… Do you want us to read it before you do?”
“I think I can handle it,” I say reaching for the envelope that has even been lick sealed and has my name on the front of it in pretty writing and a drawing of flowers, hearts, stars, rainbows, teddy bears, and even – well I think it’s a unicorn. I laugh as I lay down on the bed. I remember the times when I was sick or upset and I would call Bill and those are all things he would whisper in to my ear to help me dream or calm down.
Caerstin,
I am so sorry for what I have done or said to you. You’re not a whore and it was ignorant of me to speak those things of you. Please, please, please, forgive me. All I can do is think of you. I cannot sleep at night with you not at my side. Don’t you believe that everyone deserves a second chance? I love you, Caerstin. I will always love you. I want to help you raise the baby… If you want to see or talk to me, you know where my room is… Love you…
Yours forever and eternally,
Bill Kaulitz
I wipe the unexpected tears away from my eyes as I grab a piece of another piece of paper and a pencil to write him back.
Bill,
You called me a whore… You can’t get me back that easily… You are going to have to work… You have to prove yourself worthy of being with me. You are going to have to date me.
Sincerely,
Caerstin
I slip the little envelope under his door and as soon as I shut our room door his door opens and he picks the letter up. Tom comes over and pulls me beside him on the couch. “I want you to take another test…”
“Another test? But why?”
“Because I helped make the child so I want to watch you take the test… Maybe, it’ll help me grasp this whole situation.” I look to Salvator.
“Do we even still have any tests left?”
“Under the cabinet.” I get up and go to the bathroom to take the test, Tom walking on my heels on the way. Thank god he doesn’t have shoes on! That would have hurt like hell! After I take the test I decide to get in the shower. I wet my air then squirt the shampoo in my hair and begin to lather it in my hair.
“I am an ocean. I am the sea. There is a world inside of me. Lost in the abyss. Drowned in the deep.
No set of lungs could salvage me. Only a shipwreck, only a ghost. Merely a graveyard of your former self.
We just watched the waves crash over. And I've been cast astray. There is a hell, believe me I've seen it, there is a heaven, lets keep it a secret. There is a hell, believe me I've seen it, there is a heaven, lets keep it a secret. I am an ocean. I am the sea. There is a world inside of me. Lost in the abyss. Drowned in the deep. No set of lungs could salvage me. Save yourself. Save your breath. The tide's too strong. You'll catch your death. So breathe for me, just breathe. There is a hell, believe me I've seen it. There is a heaven, lets keep it a secret. Oh! If we make it through the night, if I make it out alive. Lord have mercy and pray for the dead. You say that you can save me, don't hope to ever find me. I fear I'm too far gone.
Pray for the dead. If we make it through the night, if I make it out alive. Lord have mercy and pray for the dead. You say that you can save me, don't hope to ever find me. I fear I'm too far gone. Pray for the dead. Yeah! Ladies and gentlemen, can I have your full undivided attention?
There is something you all really need to know. There is a hell, believe me I've seen it. There is a heaven, lets keep it a secret. If we make it through the night. If I make it out alive. You say that you can save me, don't hope to ever find me. I fear I'm too far gone. Pray for the dead. If we make it through the night, if I make it out alive. Lord have mercy and pray for the dead. You say that you can save me, don't hope to ever find me. I fear I'm too far gone. Pray for the dead. I am the ocean. I am the sea. There is a world inside of me,” I sing quietly to myself.
I wash my body and then turn the water off. When I turn around Bill’s imaginary form is standing there watching me. “What the hell, Bill! You move a step up with my trust and you just lost that step!” He frowns.
“I’m sorry! I promise I wasn’t masturbating! I just missed you and wanted to talk to you.”
“Bill your room is right in front of mine. You could have just came over and waited for me to get out!” I begin to cry and slump down to the bottom of the shower floor. Bill disappears and then a few seconds later I hear the bathroom door being unlocked. Bill walks in and wraps me in his arms. “Stop it! You’ll ruin your clothes!” I try to push him away but he won’t let me go.
“Caerstin, why are you crying?”
“Because you saw me naked! And wet! At the same time!” Bill rolls his eyes.
“We have both seen every nook and cranny of each other. Between every crease and everything! It’s nothing new so why are you crying? Are you embarrassed? Or just under shock? I want to know, baby…” I look up to him with the most pitiful look.
“Because I’m getting fat and my thighs are huge and my boobs are even bigger and I’m ugly!”
“First of all; you are not fat. Second of all; I like meat on thighs. Third of all; Big boobs are nice. Fourth of all; You’re the most beautiful girl in the world.” I smile. Bill just earned his step back. “And no matter what I will always love you.”
Step 1: Holding hands.
Step 2: Cuddling.
Step 3: Sharing food/drink.
Step 4: Kissing
Step 5: Sharing a bed.
Step 6: I love you.
Step 7: Engaged.
Step 8: Marriage.
Step 9: Sex.
I love you is not until step 6. We’re only on step 3. “And I know I just skipped a bunch of steps but I felt liked you needed to hear that so I said it. He just upgraded to step 4. I smile and kiss his cheek.
“Thanks… You upgraded to step 4, by the way….” He smiles.
“Thanks… I really needed that kiss… Why don’t you get dressed now okay… I’ll be in the living room with the guys if you need me.”
“Okay.” Bill stands up and leaves but as soon as he leaves Salv comes in. I look to him as I stand up and he smiles. “Salv, do you think we could go shopping?”
“Shopping? For what?” He laughs at me as I try to hook my way too small bra. “Need help with that?”
“Please…” Salvator is the only guy I know that can hook a bra the right way and unhook it. Most times guys can’t get them hooked. They can only unhook. But thankfully I have Salv. “I need new bras.”
“Shouldn’t you be shopping for stuff like that with Tom? He’s the one being allowed to put the baby at ease.” I give Salv my “don’t give me that bull fuck” look.
“You know that when no one is around I always have something in store. It’s not my fault Tom is greedy.” Salv pouts. “Look this is why I want you to come with me. We can get another room throw in a round, go shopping, come back throw in another round and then come back up to this room.” Salvator smiles.
“Aw! Babe! You have everything planned out!” I wink at him, making him grab at the extra member in his pants. I catch a glimpse of Bill’s Imaginative figure. His face is unreadable. I study it wondering how much he knows. He disappears quickly.
“Bill? What’s wrong? Are you okay,” I hear Tom ask.
“No, I’m not fucking okay!” I finish getting dressed and go in to the living room. Bill looks to me with sad eyes then look to Tom. “How could you, Tom?! First you come in my girlfriend making her pregnant! Now you’re fucking getting free sex? What the hell?! Just because you impregnated her does not mean you can still sleep with her! She is my girlfriend! Not yours!” Bill lunges across the room putting Tom in a head lock. While Salv tries to break the fight, I go to Bill’s room knowing he’ll obviously want to talk to me. What seems like millions of hours later Bill finally comes back.
Chapter End Notes:
hehe
He crawls up on to the bed with me and stares deep in to my eyes. “Are you okay,” I whisper.
“Yeah.” He turns over on his back and turns on the television. I hear the Rugrats theme song and I immediately turn to see what’s on. It is the Rugrats!
“I love this show! Since when do you watch this kind of stuff?!” Even though I am seventeen I still watch baby shows. I absolutely love them!
“I’ve started watching them… With the baby on the way, I might as well start watching them now…”
“Awww… That’s so sweet,” I tell him and scoot closer. He wraps his arm around me and kisses my forehead as I am absorbed in to Tommy, Lil, Phil, and Chucky trying to find Reptar. Reptar is so awesome! Aye you talking to me?
N-no I was talking to Tommy… I laugh hysterically making Bill laugh along. “How about some popcorn?”
“Yes,” I answer with excitement. Bill gets up and I hear the microwave start up. “I don’t like Angelica.”
“I know! She’s so mean to the babies!” I frown as the show goes off.
“Well so much for popcorn… The show just went off…”
“It’s a disk. Thirteen episodes.” I smile and whenever he gets back in the bed with the popcorn, I kiss him on the lips. Looks to me like Tommy took too many hallucinates. You’re our little boy, our biggest pride and joy, so go on and get some rest, then you will feel the best… I smile. How sweet! I hope we have a boy…
“If it’s a boy I want to name him Tommy…” Bill stiffens beside me and hugs my waist tighter as I grab a hand full of the nice and delicious buttery popcorn.
“How come?”
“Ever since I was little I’ve always loved this show and Tommy has always been my favorite character…” I know what Bill’s thinking… He’s probably thinking that I want to name my baby after his father and that Tommy from the show is just an excuse but it’s not. I real want to name him Tommy from Rugrats.
[^*^*^*^^**********************^^^^^^^^^^^^^^***********^^^^^^^************^^^^^^^^^^]
Snap and roll, I’m out of control… Michelle sips on her grape juice as she grinds up on the guys. Bill has her back. Salvator has her side and Tom has her front. She sips on her juice and then stops when the music does. I want my ass smacked… All the guys smack on my ass with the song and I start smiling. Move move shake shake now drop what your momma said… Oh baby, baby…
Salvator’s point of view
Bill and Tom have their eyes closed when Michelle rubs her hand from my knee to my stomach. Shake it like a salt shaker shake it like a salt shaker. When she rubs her hand through the path again she hits my member and I bite my lip. She winks up at me and I smile. She quickly stops and runs away. Not too long after that I get a text from her saying meet me in the bathroom. I quickly make my way to the bathroom.
I’ll take you to the candy shop… When I knock on the ladies bathroom door Michelle opens it with a smile and pulls me with her in to one of the stalls. I smile as she makes out with me, putting me in a trans as she unzips my pants.
“Michelle,” I hear someone yell. My eyelids flutter open and I sigh.
“What? I haven’t even had time to sleep!” Salvator frowns.
“Sorry… Do you want me to let you sleep?” I moan as he kisses my forehead. His voice drops to a whisper. “I just wanted to thank you for tonight…” I smile and nod. I feel him cuddle up beside me and kiss my cheek. “Goodnight, Michelle… I love you…”
“Love you, too,” I mumble before falling in to a deep sleep. When I wake up the next morning I am alone in my bed. “Salv? Tomie? Billa,” I call out. I feel all three of the guys jump down on to my bed at once. I jump forward with a shock. “What the lemons you guys?!”
“You called for all three of us so it’s your fault we all came,” Tom says.
“You know we’re always here waiting for you, when you wake up,” Bill whispers in my ear and kisses my cheek.
“Always,” Salvator agrees. I smile and pull the guys in for a hug. My stomach twists and I run in to the bathroom throwing up. They run after me. Tom holds my hair back, Salv rubs my back, and Bill gets me a wet washcloth.
“We need to tell my parents that I knocked you up…”
“You haven’t told them?!”
“No! Are you crazy!?”
“Well you are going to be the one to tell them. If you think I’m going to be the one to tell them, you’re a freaking idiot!”
“Why don’t I take you shopping today,” Tom suggests. What? Did he really just ask me that? Since when does he like shopping? I blink twice as he sweeps some wandering hair behind my ear. He bends over to whisper in my ear. “Whatever it is you’re doing with Bill to make you fall in love with him, I want to do it, too…” I freeze.
“You want to date me,” I stutter. Tom nods.
[~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~]
I laugh as we get in the car after a full day of shopping. Tom smiles at me and rests his hand on my thigh. “Are you having fun?” I smile and roll my eyes.
“Uh, are you crazy?! I’m having the worst time of my life!” Tom’s smile fades tremendously as he stares deep in to my eyes. I laugh. “I’m just playing, babe!” He lets out a sigh of relief and smiles at me once more.
“Let’s go to babies-R-us and get something for the baby!”
“What could we possibly get? We don’t even know what we’re having yet!”
“That’s the fun part!” I laugh.
“Okay I’m going to do something but you can’t tell anyone that you are already on the step Bill and I are on, okay.” Tom looks at me with a confused look. He knows the steps but he doesn’t know which one Bill and I are on. I lean in slowly and kiss his lips. When I pull away his eyes grow wide.
“We’re already on step four?!” I smile and nod.. He smiles. “You are so beautiful,” He tells me as he rubs the side of my face. I smile as he leans in to make out with me. After a few minutes I pull away. Tom laughs. I get a text from Bill. How’s the date going so far?
Wonderful! =] When we get to babies-R-us and get inside everything turns to slow motion. It’s like shopping for a teddy bear at build a bear workshop! I smile as I feel Tom grip my waist and squeeze tightly.
What step are you on with him?
He doesn’t know what step we are on so you won’t know what step we’re on. “Michelle, can I ask you a question?”
“Of course!”
“Would you want to live with me? After we reach step five?” I stop walking and turn to look at him. “You don’t have to answer me right now… You can do it later… I just wanted you to know that I don’t mind and I would like that…” He wraps his arms around my waist and we start walking again.
Three months later
“Michelle,” Tom calls from beside me. I moan and turn over on my side.
“What?” I feel the bed shift beside me before I feel Tom creeping over on top of me. I open my eyes to look at him. My eyes grow wide as I grab at his hair.
“Oh my god, Tom! Your hair! Your dreads are gone! They’re cornrows! And it’s black! Why!?” He smirks and kisses my lips as I turn over on my back. We’re only on the fifth step so having him on top of me is still a little weird.
“I thought you would like it better… Do you?”
“Yes! It’s so cute on you, baby!” I let my eyes wonder further down to finish checking him out. He has on a white wife beater and his good pair of blue jeans on.
“Guess what,” He whispers in my ear. “We get to find out what the baby is today!” I smile.
“Is that why you’re all dressed up?” He blushes and I laugh. We decided that we’re not going to move in with each other until after we get our own house so we’re still stuck in the hotel with all of the other guys. Bill and I are no longer in a relationship but he is still a part of my life. Tom rubs my stomach and then his hands come up to cup my breasts for the first time since I have been pregnant. I wince but smile anyway.
“They’re getting so big!” I laugh. This will be the first time we’ll be seeing our baby. We haven’t been at all so we don’t even know if I’m carrying twins or not. I feel his pride stabbing in to the bottom of my stomach and I laugh.
“Are the guys in here?”
“No. They all went down to the lobby for breakfast.”
“I want to watch you,” I say pointing to the obvious issue in his pants. He cocks an eyebrow at me.
“You want to watch me jack off? I wasn’t even going to fix it,” He says with a laugh.
“I think I just want to sleep with you. I don’t want to go through all the steps anymore.” He smiles and kisses my lips.
“Well, we can when I get us a house, okay?” I moan. “Did you know that you were the last person I slept with?” I smile. That means so much to me!
“Awww babe! That’s so sweet!”
“We need to get ready, okay? I have a lot of special news today…” I stand up and stretch. I’m not huge but I’m not small either. Tom can wear my pants from before I was pregnant but I couldn’t fit in his. But now I can.
“I have no clean pants that fit… Can I wear a pair of yours?” Tom smiles and tosses me a pair of his jeans from the dresser. I smile and put them on. “Thank you…” I toss on my white tank top and get Tom’s jacket to put on. I also steal one of his hats. He comes out of the bathroom with dick in hand but after string at me for a few moments and calling my name out he comes. I whine. “I wanted to watch you!”
“I just started! I was really horny and I haven’t fucked in such a long time and when I saw you, four squeezes and a pull or two was all it took!” He wraps his arms around me. “I’m sorry baby… Please forgive me…” I smile and kiss his cheek.
“Okay…” The door flings open and the guys come in laughing and yakking loudly. Tom works fast to get himself back in his pants.
“Can we go,” Salvator asks me. I frown.
“No… Not this time… Maybe you can come next time.”
“What do you think the baby will be,” Bill asks me as he hugs me with a huge smile on his face.
“I don’t know…”
“I think it’s going to be a girl,” Tom tells us. Tom grabs my hand after I get my shoes on and stand up. “You ready to go?” I smile and grab his hand.
“Yeah.”
“Call us once you find out what you’re having,” The guys yell at us as we leave the house.
“We will,” I yell back.
The nurse spreads the cold blue jelly on my stomach as Tom rubs my hand with his thumb. She rubs the wand over it. “Is this your first child?”
“Yes, ma’am. This is also our first ultrasound, too…” Two little balls pop up on the screen. I study it closely.
“Looks like you are having twins…” I look to Tom with a holy shit expression on my face. “Do you want to know the genders?” I nod eagerly as she moves the wand around some more. “Um… You are having… A boy… And… A… Girl…”
“I do not want to be an imaginary friend anymore, Caerstin! I want to be with you for real!” I look around the hallway to make sure that no one is paying any attention to me. ...And this hallway is where? A school? A psycho ward?
“Bill stop thinking such nonsense! You are with me,” I whisper under my breath.
“Yeah! In your imagination!” I make my way to the bathroom and lock us in to a small stall. Ewe. Somebody forgot to flush. Must've been that sheep. Bill sulks. I put my hands on his shoulders and reach up on my tippy toes to better look him in the eyes. His arms wrap around me. He is oddly detached from this action, as if they wrapped around her of their own volition.
“Billa, I love you regardless if I am the only person who can see you like this or not. Is that not enough?...”
“I love you.”
“I love you, too.” Bill kisses my lips and I smile.
“Let’s go back home.”
“Are you going to come get me in your real body?” Bill has this special talent where he can turn himself in to the imaginary when he can not be around or near me. ...What? He is an actual person in a humans body. I'm honestly not following. And he is awesome in bed either way! Absolutely wonderful! My panties get wet at the thought. Oh, Mika! Everything is about sex to you! . . . . WAIT, he's imaginary. So she just masturbates and imagines him?
“Yes… Where do you want to go?”
“Just back to your place or something…"
__________________________________________________________
“You look really good today,” Bill comments , looking down at me as I lay in his lap.
“You’re just saying that because you want bootie.” Yeah, baby booties.
“No! I really do mean it! But sex is always good, too!” I smile and glide on top of him like whoosh!!!. “I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
__________________________________________________________
“You mean so much to me,” Bill tells me as we lay naked cuddled up in each others arms under the nice warm black fuzziness of his blankets. That's 5 adjectives, there.
“Well that’s good to know! You mean a lot to me, too!” I laugh. “Do you think it’ll ever be possible for us to go public? With you being a rock star and all?...” An imaginary rock star friend.
“I don’t know… It all depends on the future with my music..."
__________________________________________________________
Tom leaves a trail of kisses and hickies on my body from my chin to my knees as I lay there enjoying the special treatment. Bill bursts in to the room. I guess he didn’t like the fact that I was ignoring him. And WHEN were you ignoring him? You never said.... I’m just surprised he came all the way from Spain just to see why I was ignoring him! He was in Spain at some point? Thanks for telling us. “What the fuck?!” My head snaps up as Tom’s does too.
“Bill?! Ever heard of knocking?!” His face turns bright red. Tom can see Bill? Wait, so . . . . . Is Bill real now? What is going on? Is this all in Caerstin's head? Is this some complex fantasy she's daydreaming about?
“What the hell are you doing?!”
“Getting the attention that I need! Something you can’t give me!” LOL who's saying this? Tom or Caerstin? For laughs, let's imagine it's Tom.
“Tom, I can’t give you attention when I’m on tour!”
“That’s my point!”
“Get off of her,” Bill yells pulling Tom’s arm until he obeys. I have this mental image of Bill weakly tugging on Tom's arm. “You,” He points to me. “Are coming on tour with me! I’m not leaving you alone anymore!”
“I don’t want to! I want to stay here with my boyfriend!”
“I am your boyfriend!”
“No you’re not!” Ouch. Bill storms out of the house with tears in his eyes. I run after him (naked still? O_o) and eventually find him beside his car. Aww, poor Billy must have locked his keys inside. I wrap my arms around him. “I’m so sorry, Bill… I should not have said that… I’m sorry… I will go on tour with you if you want me to…” I do not want to loose Bill. I love him too much for him to leave now. And yet you still have hickies from Tom.
“I just don’t see why you cheated on me,” He sniffles while playing with a strand of grass. Wait, so they're sitting down now? NO idea as to character orientation. Oh, Mika! “I was giving you all the attention that I could… Sex when I was in town, sexting when you missed me, calling when I could, texting you when I had the time…” I love how Mika starts off with sex. She also lists sexting and texting as two things different enough to be listed separately.
“I know, I’m sorry… Do you still want to be with me?”
“Yes… I still want you to come on tour with me…” Right out of bed with one man and he still takes her back. This is completely normal to do, by the way. Fidelity be damned. Oh, Mika!
“Then I will, okay…”
“Okay…” Bill turns in my arms to hug me back. “I love you…”
“I love you, too…”
__________________________________________________________
I cuddle up to Bill as he eats his slice of pizza on the sofa watching the television. I didn't know sofas could watch television. I have been sick lately… Throwing up, loss of appetite, drowsiness, dizziness… Bill says that it is probably just motion sickness from being on the bus for so long. “You had a good concert tonight…” He smiles.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah… Bill?... Can I tell you something?... Without you freaking out…”
“Of course, angel!”
“My period is late…”
“H-how late?” Any other boy would be all awkward and say, "Erm....ok." Bill here is oddly in tune with the nuances of the female menstrual cycle.
“Four weeks after I slept with Tom kind of late…” Bill gazes in to my eyes with seriousness. Not seriously-- with seriousness.
“But we use c-condoms…” Bill has developed a stutter.
“Tom didn’t have one when he came over and I was out…” My voice breaks. Bill throws the rest of his pizza in the box. Pizza flinger!
“How could you fucking do this to me, Caerstin?! You’re such a fucking whore!"
And I agree! I don't see how being imaginary matters anymore, despite the story being titled such. Bill seems plenty real by now. I really don't know. And there is the chance this is an elaborate daydream, and Caerstin will suddenly wake at the end saying, "My! What a vivid dream! Lol, good thing it's not real!" OR MAYBE maybe Tom is imaginary too! Bill and Tom are fighting to be her imaginary sex fantasy friends! That MUST be it!
And now on to chapter 2. It begins with a new unintroduced character named Salvator. Mika Dan provides us a link to Salvator's picture. He's quite the looker. I think that Mika Dan knows him in real life and likes him, so she wrote this story putting herself with him.
Tears stream down both my cheeks (versus only one cheek) as I sit in the hotel lobby waiting on Salvator to come pick me up. Salvator is my best friend! I love him so much! After Bill and I had our fight I called him and he said that he would come get me. Bill walks in the hotels front doors with his bodyguards. I could have sworn that Bill and Caerstin were on the tour bus before, not a hotel. He has just got back from his concert and does not know that I’m leaving. His eyes find my packed bags before they find my eyes. The boy has an eye for luggage. I also imagine 2 eyeballs rolling around on the floor, searching for things.
“Babe? What are you doing?”
“I’m waiting on Salv to come get me.”
“Caerstin, it’s snowing out side… Eight inches… Where are you going to go?”
“Salv is going to take me back to his place.”
“Caerstin,” I hear Salv call with his cute amazing accent. So where is Salv from? I turn around to see him coming over with a few bags of his own. “Hey are you ready to go up to our room?”
“I thought we were going to go over to your house.”
“No, it is too snowy outside. My dad owns this hotel so we can stay here for free,” He says with a smile. Convenient. Salv is a devilish good looker, has an accent, and his dad owns a hotel. Such a rich character background!
“Okay! Lets go!” Bill grabs my arm.
“You are kidding me right?”
“Bill you called me a whore…” Salv stops dead in tracks. You know, being in a relationship with a man, being caught in bed with another man, and going to a hotel room with a third different man qualifies you for being a whore. Bill's just saying the truth.
“Excuse me? He did what?”
“Salv come on let’s just go okay? I’ll tell you about it later.” I grab Salv’s hand and lead him to the elevator. Bill follows close behind us.
“I love you,” Salv tells me unaware of Bill’s presence until we get in the elevator. I burry my face in his arm until we get out. Burry. Google tells me burry means pertaining to burrs; prickly.
“Well, this is interesting,” Bill says as Salv opens our room door. “One bed.” I'm personally not surprised. Mika Dan loves her some sex.
“Go away, Bill!” He shrugs his shoulders and goes to the room in front of us. I picture their hotel room with a little dollhouse sized room on the floor in front of them. “Why the hell is our room so close to his,” I ask Salvator once we get our things unpacked.
“I thought we could have some fun with it… Here are the tests… They are multiple choice and short answer. You have 1 hour. Keep your eyes on your own paper. If you are pregnant can we have sex?...Because um… Because of all this fighting you’ve been put through…” I laugh. Ah, Mika. "I was in a fight. Let's have sex! Sex makes everything better! Oh, and I'm pregnant too. Solution: Sex!"
“I don’t know. Maybe.” I wink and go to the bathroom. Salv follows me.
“Do you think I could help raise it?” Raise what? Seriously, raise what?
“If you want to.”
“I’m hungry… Are you hungry?” Hungry for SEX.
“Salv you’re asking too many questions…” He's only asked three. I get up and go over to the couch to sit down with the test to call Tom. What test is this? Does Salv just magically have tests on hand?
“Hello?”
“Hey… Um… I just took a pregnancy test and am about to get the results…” "Hey, whassup? I'm taking a pregnancy test! How are you?" Oh, it was a pregnancy test! I was picturing paper tests. Question: Why are there "tests" in the plural? Salv had more than one.
“I don’t want to know…” Tom's a keeper.
“Tom you’re the only guy I’ve ever slept with without a condom so you’re the only possible father.” YOU ARE NOT THE FATHER!
“If you are with that man- woman I don’t want to talk to you.” Caerstin is known to often be with transsexual people.
“I’m not with him… Oh my god, Tom… It’s positive…” Lol, I get it now. Tom was calling Bill a girl. It was confusing because we've been given no descriptions as to the characters physical traits. And lol, it's positive. Idiot-proof, just for Caerstin.
“Shit, Caerstin… Where are you?” I give him the address and the room number and then fall in to Salvator’s arms to cry. I thought Tom didn't care.
“Damn shit babe…” Damn shit. It gets everywhere.
“I am a whore, Salv,” I sob in to his chest. You've seen the light! What's strange is that sleeping around doesn't qualify you as a whore, but finding out you're pregnant does.
“You are not a whore Caerstin. Bill’s a whore… How? Bill hasn't slept around. Plus he's not pregnant. Come on. Dry your tears and let’s have some fun.”
“Salv, I’m not in the mood right now…”
“Not that kind of fun. I’m saving all of that for tonight. Let’s bang on the walls and make sex noises really loud. It will annoy the living fuck out of Bill. That is why I got us a room so close to his.” I laugh and nod my head. Salv planned all this? He's the smartest character here.
“Let’s do it! Bill has an interview it like a few minutes! There's 8 inches of snow outside. How can people come to interview him? Perfect timing!” It IS oddly convenient, isn't it? Salv puts soap in his hands as I hang up the do not disturb sign on the door knob. Salv starts working his hands as I bang on the wall. Salv is very good at washing his hands. He's working up a thick lather.... Why did he get soap again? “Oh shit! Ohhh!” Salv bangs his head on the wall as I begin jumping on the bed. He presses his eye to the peep hole and smiles at me. I like how they're having sex all over the room, simultaneously. Up against the door, AND on the bed-- at the same time!
“Oh fuck, Caerstin! Oh baby! Tighter!“ I whimper. “You like that?” Salv gives me a thumbs up telling me that Bill is out of his room.
“Oh, Salvator! You’re so much better than Bill has ever been!” It's common to mention other sexual partners during sex. Not a turn off at all.
“I’m about to come!” I yell out a little louder finishing the whole thing off. Salv falls to the floor biting his lip to keep from laughing. My phone rings and I wait to answer it.
“Hello,” I ask breathing hard.
“Open your door.”
“What? No!”
“Now!”
“This is a bad time, Bill…”
“I said now!”
“Hold on!” I hang up on him and quickly yank my clothes off. “Bill wants to see me… Take your clothes off and come on the bed,” I whisper. Salv doesn’t take any time following my orders. Soon he’s yanking and pulling as hard as he can and by the time I’m undressed he has already finished. Yanking and pulling on what? His clothes? His penis? Mika Dan doesn't clarify. I rumple my hair and throw on his shirt then begin going towards the door.
“Wait,” Salv whispers. He dips a finger in his seed and puts a trail of the white stickiness on my face and adds some to the back of my leg. Best friends are perfectly comfortable smearing their bodily fluids on each other. Eww. After he hides himself in the sheets I open the door.
“What do you want?”
Chapter End Notes:
hehe i love my sexy salvator! hes my teaddy bear!! ;3
I'm rendered speechless! This chapter beats all. That sex scene was very strange. Let's move on.
Bill studies me with his eyes working his way from my hair to my pretty pink polished toes. I read this as: "Bill plucked out his eyeballs and rolled them down my body, from my hair to my pretty pink polished toes, which was a detail we really needed to know." “Bill we’re going to be late,” Andi tells Bill. Bill pulls his eyes from me and leaves. O HAI ANDI, didn't see you there. Who are you again?
“What did he want,” Salv asks. Wow, seriously? Bill is her boyfriend, and just moments beforehand, she and Salv were purposely making loud sex sounds. Of course Bill wants to know what's going on, and she opens the door to show him Salv's cum on her face. And Salv is seriously so knuckle-headed to ask, "What did he want?" Seriously?!
“I don’t know. He just stared at me.” I remember the sperm on my face and it makes my cheeks go red. You smeared it there, you whore!
“The come thing wasn’t too much, was it?” YES. Best friends don't share bodily fluids. I look down at the ruined bed sheets.
“Nope!” *facepalm* Salvator steps closer to me and wipes his seed off my face but I grab his hand and lick it off before he can wipe it off on the sheets. There are no limits to their best friend bond. Ugh. He moans and his manhood stretches. LOL Now I'm picturing penises doing yoga! It stretches its glutes and hamstrings, proving to be as flexible as a gymnast!
“Why don’t we get cleaned up and then go get something to eat?” I smile.
“Okay! So who is going to get in first?”
“Do you think we could just have sex now? I’m really hard…” But he just came moments before. What rapid recovery time.
“Shower sex?”
“If that is okay with you…”
“Sure!” They must be friends with benefits. Caerstin really is a whore.
__________________________________________________________
“I don’t know what to get,” I complain to Salv. “Everything sounds weird.” He laughs.
“It’s just because you are pregnant.” The way the rest rant (lol rest rant) is set up, whenever you walk in to the hotel, there’s like a little lobby and then in this glass room is the rest rant. So when you first walk in you can see every one in the room because the ceiling is a mirror. What vivid and eloquent setting skills. And what was that for, Mika? Salv looks up at the ceiling and laughs. “I can see your boobies!”THERE we go. The any time Mika bothers putting in details is if it's about sex. I laugh. I laugh too.
“Wow Salv.” Bill walks in to the rest rant with another girl and Salv snickers. “What?” Bill's revenge.
“Nothing.” He moves over to my side and lets me lean in to him. His arms wrap around me and I smile. “Why do you not get some noodles? "Why do you not" is how we speak english nowadays. I know you like noodles… They have shrimp cocktails…” I love how Salvator can tell me what all is on the menu without looking at it! Like he's psychic! No wait, I forgot-- his dad owns the place. “I can have them cook you anything you want! It doesn’t even have to be on the menu!”
“Really?! That is so cool!” Salv smiles.
“Yeah, I know!”
“I want the shrimp cocktail! And champagne!”
“You can’t have champagne baby… I can get you some type of sparkling drink if you want…”
“Same thing!” Not necessarily... one has alcohol, the other doesn't. After we order our food, I get a phone call from Tom. “Hello?”
“Hey… Why do I not (Again with the resistance to make contractions. Mika, it's "why don't I.") just wait until you come home to visit? I can’t even get half way up my own driveway because of the snow…”
“That’s okay!” Salv takes his hat off and puts it on me. Oh, he's wearing a hat?
“Beautiful!” I laugh and take my bracelet and hook it around his wrist. Oh, she's wearing a bracelet? For all I know, and from what Mika has not described, they could both still be naked for all I know. Also, I love how she apparently just hung up on Tom.
“Beautiful!”
“I love you so much,” Salv says and kisses my lips. I smile.
“I love you, too!” As soon as I take the first bite of my shrimp I pause dramatically. Dramatic Chipmunk! “Where is the bathroom?”
“I’ll take you…” Salv tells the waiter that we’ll be back but he is not quick enough. I run out the front doors and go over to a bush to throw up behind it. Salv runs after me and pulls my hair back. He gently rubs circles in my back. Sickness from pregnancy is very dramatic.
“Is she okay,” I hear Bill ask. Did he just abandon that poor girl he was with?
“No,” I blurt out before throwing up again.
“You put something in the food to poison her,” Bill accuses. Because that's a common path of logic to take. You're sick? You must have been poisoned! And that's funny too, cuz Bill knows she's pregnant.
“Did not!”
“Did too!”
“She’s pregnant tightwad! That is the only thing wrong with her! Do you want to get a to go box and go back up to the room babe?” Salv is insensitive. The last thing a vomiting pregnant woman wants is the food to be put in a to go box, so she can smell it and get sick again.
“I was hoping tonight would be romantic but I ruined it,” I begin to cry. It's not the fault of the pregnancy at all.
“Babe, you didn’t ruin it… Tonight can still be romantic… Do you want to go back and eat? I can order you something else to eat…” What's with the persistant idea of keeping food around! She just puked, no food for now.
“Whatever! You don’t know how to be romantic!” Salv turns around to look at Bill.
“That’s not what she told me after she was through screaming my name!” *facepalm* Mika, it takes a lot to grate on my nerves. You're doing it.
“Both of you shut up! Bill go back to doing whatever (or whoever) the hell you were doing!” After Bill leaves, Salv helps me up off my knees and hugs me.
“What do you want to go do? Do you want to go back in and eat or do you want to go back up to our room?” Stop with the eating already. SHE IS SICK YOU MORON.
“Can we just go back to our room? I’m sleepy…” Salvator kisses my forehead.
“Of course baby!”
Maybe it's late at night, maybe I'm irritable, but this story seems especially annoying to read right now. I think I'm gonna take a break. One can only suffer so much Mika before becoming irritable.
I think it's the dialogue. It's nuts how she writes "words someone said" and then "a reaction or action someone else did" in the same sentence or with no separation. It makes you think that whoever said it did the action, or the other way around. Example: “ 'Whatever! You don’t know how to be romantic!' Salv turns around to look at Bill." So, Bill said that, but Salv is immediately mentioned instead, and it makes you think Salv said it. But Bill said it, judging from the action afterward. Bill wasn't mentioned for an entire paragraph and then he suddenly said something out of the blue and without any identification as to saying it. Yeah, that's annoying. Mika does it a lot.
When I wake up the next morning, Salvator and Tom are up whispering to each other quietly trying to not wake me up. I thought Tom wasn’t going to come up… Apparently he changed his mind. I sit up in the bed and rub my eyes. “Salv? Tom?” Tom comes over to me and brushes the hair from my forehead.
“You’re not a whore. I know a whore anywhere. And you baby are very far from a whore, you understand? Don’t let Bill tell you, you are… He doesn’t know what he’s talking about… I can’t believe you’re pregnant…”
“Hey, I told you to pull out but you’re the one with the late reactions.” Tom smirks at me.
“I’m sorry I fucked you up…” I laugh.
“Don’t tell me that yet! Wait until I am in labor!” I get up and pull back on my shorts before going to the bathroom to brush my teeth. Salvator follows behind me.
“Bill came over late last night.” I turn to face him with my toothpaste moustache. What? He’s lying. Bill does not care about me. He proved that hypothesis when he called me a whore. “He came at around 11:36 but you were passed out. He stayed up until Tom got here around 3:00.”
“Liar.”
“I’m not lying. He left you this. He wrote it here, too… I wanted to read it to make sure it was hateful or mean but he told me that if I read it I would die… Do you want us to read it before you do?”
“I think I can handle it,” I say reaching for the envelope that has even been lick sealed and has my name on the front of it in pretty writing and a drawing of flowers, hearts, stars, rainbows, teddy bears, and even – well I think it’s a unicorn. I laugh as I lay down on the bed. I remember the times when I was sick or upset and I would call Bill and those are all things he would whisper in to my ear to help me dream or calm down.
Caerstin,
I am so sorry for what I have done or said to you. You’re not a whore and it was ignorant of me to speak those things of you. Please, please, please, forgive me. All I can do is think of you. I cannot sleep at night with you not at my side. Don’t you believe that everyone deserves a second chance? I love you, Caerstin. I will always love you. I want to help you raise the baby… If you want to see or talk to me, you know where my room is… Love you…
Yours forever and eternally,
Bill Kaulitz
I wipe the unexpected tears away from my eyes as I grab a piece of another piece of paper and a pencil to write him back.
Bill,
You called me a whore… You can’t get me back that easily… You are going to have to work… You have to prove yourself worthy of being with me. You are going to have to date me.
Sincerely,
Caerstin
I slip the little envelope under his door and as soon as I shut our room door his door opens and he picks the letter up. Tom comes over and pulls me beside him on the couch. “I want you to take another test…”
“Another test? But why?”
“Because I helped make the child so I want to watch you take the test… Maybe, it’ll help me grasp this whole situation.” I look to Salvator.
“Do we even still have any tests left?”
“Under the cabinet.” I get up and go to the bathroom to take the test, Tom walking on my heels on the way. Thank god he doesn’t have shoes on! That would have hurt like hell! After I take the test I decide to get in the shower. I wet my air then squirt the shampoo in my hair and begin to lather it in my hair.
“I am an ocean. I am the sea. There is a world inside of me. Lost in the abyss. Drowned in the deep.
No set of lungs could salvage me. Only a shipwreck, only a ghost. Merely a graveyard of your former self.
We just watched the waves crash over. And I've been cast astray. There is a hell, believe me I've seen it, there is a heaven, lets keep it a secret. There is a hell, believe me I've seen it, there is a heaven, lets keep it a secret. I am an ocean. I am the sea. There is a world inside of me. Lost in the abyss. Drowned in the deep. No set of lungs could salvage me. Save yourself. Save your breath. The tide's too strong. You'll catch your death. So breathe for me, just breathe. There is a hell, believe me I've seen it. There is a heaven, lets keep it a secret. Oh! If we make it through the night, if I make it out alive. Lord have mercy and pray for the dead. You say that you can save me, don't hope to ever find me. I fear I'm too far gone.
Pray for the dead. If we make it through the night, if I make it out alive. Lord have mercy and pray for the dead. You say that you can save me, don't hope to ever find me. I fear I'm too far gone. Pray for the dead. Yeah! Ladies and gentlemen, can I have your full undivided attention?
There is something you all really need to know. There is a hell, believe me I've seen it. There is a heaven, lets keep it a secret. If we make it through the night. If I make it out alive. You say that you can save me, don't hope to ever find me. I fear I'm too far gone. Pray for the dead. If we make it through the night, if I make it out alive. Lord have mercy and pray for the dead. You say that you can save me, don't hope to ever find me. I fear I'm too far gone. Pray for the dead. I am the ocean. I am the sea. There is a world inside of me,” I sing quietly to myself.
I wash my body and then turn the water off. When I turn around Bill’s imaginary form is standing there watching me. “What the hell, Bill! You move a step up with my trust and you just lost that step!” He frowns.
“I’m sorry! I promise I wasn’t masturbating! I just missed you and wanted to talk to you.”
“Bill your room is right in front of mine. You could have just came over and waited for me to get out!” I begin to cry and slump down to the bottom of the shower floor. Bill disappears and then a few seconds later I hear the bathroom door being unlocked. Bill walks in and wraps me in his arms. “Stop it! You’ll ruin your clothes!” I try to push him away but he won’t let me go.
“Caerstin, why are you crying?”
“Because you saw me naked! And wet! At the same time!” Bill rolls his eyes.
“We have both seen every nook and cranny of each other. Between every crease and everything! It’s nothing new so why are you crying? Are you embarrassed? Or just under shock? I want to know, baby…” I look up to him with the most pitiful look.
“Because I’m getting fat and my thighs are huge and my boobs are even bigger and I’m ugly!”
“First of all; you are not fat. Second of all; I like meat on thighs. Third of all; Big boobs are nice. Fourth of all; You’re the most beautiful girl in the world.” I smile. Bill just earned his step back. “And no matter what I will always love you.”
Step 1: Holding hands.
Step 2: Cuddling.
Step 3: Sharing food/drink.
Step 4: Kissing
Step 5: Sharing a bed.
Step 6: I love you.
Step 7: Engaged.
Step 8: Marriage.
Step 9: Sex.
I love you is not until step 6. We’re only on step 3. “And I know I just skipped a bunch of steps but I felt liked you needed to hear that so I said it. He just upgraded to step 4. I smile and kiss his cheek.
“Thanks… You upgraded to step 4, by the way….” He smiles.
“Thanks… I really needed that kiss… Why don’t you get dressed now okay… I’ll be in the living room with the guys if you need me.”
“Okay.” Bill stands up and leaves but as soon as he leaves Salv comes in. I look to him as I stand up and he smiles. “Salv, do you think we could go shopping?”
“Shopping? For what?” He laughs at me as I try to hook my way too small bra. “Need help with that?”
“Please…” Salvator is the only guy I know that can hook a bra the right way and unhook it. Most times guys can’t get them hooked. They can only unhook. But thankfully I have Salv. “I need new bras.”
“Shouldn’t you be shopping for stuff like that with Tom? He’s the one being allowed to put the baby at ease.” I give Salv my “don’t give me that bull fuck” look.
“You know that when no one is around I always have something in store. It’s not my fault Tom is greedy.” Salv pouts. “Look this is why I want you to come with me. We can get another room throw in a round, go shopping, come back throw in another round and then come back up to this room.” Salvator smiles.
“Aw! Babe! You have everything planned out!” I wink at him, making him grab at the extra member in his pants. I catch a glimpse of Bill’s Imaginative figure. His face is unreadable. I study it wondering how much he knows. He disappears quickly.
“Bill? What’s wrong? Are you okay,” I hear Tom ask.
“No, I’m not fucking okay!” I finish getting dressed and go in to the living room. Bill looks to me with sad eyes then look to Tom. “How could you, Tom?! First you come in my girlfriend making her pregnant! Now you’re fucking getting free sex? What the hell?! Just because you impregnated her does not mean you can still sleep with her! She is my girlfriend! Not yours!” Bill lunges across the room putting Tom in a head lock. While Salv tries to break the fight, I go to Bill’s room knowing he’ll obviously want to talk to me. What seems like millions of hours later Bill finally comes back.
Chapter End Notes:
hehe
He crawls up on to the bed with me and stares deep in to my eyes. “Are you okay,” I whisper.
“Yeah.” He turns over on his back and turns on the television. I hear the Rugrats theme song and I immediately turn to see what’s on. It is the Rugrats!
“I love this show! Since when do you watch this kind of stuff?!” Even though I am seventeen I still watch baby shows. I absolutely love them!
“I’ve started watching them… With the baby on the way, I might as well start watching them now…”
“Awww… That’s so sweet,” I tell him and scoot closer. He wraps his arm around me and kisses my forehead as I am absorbed in to Tommy, Lil, Phil, and Chucky trying to find Reptar. Reptar is so awesome! Aye you talking to me?
N-no I was talking to Tommy… I laugh hysterically making Bill laugh along. “How about some popcorn?”
“Yes,” I answer with excitement. Bill gets up and I hear the microwave start up. “I don’t like Angelica.”
“I know! She’s so mean to the babies!” I frown as the show goes off.
“Well so much for popcorn… The show just went off…”
“It’s a disk. Thirteen episodes.” I smile and whenever he gets back in the bed with the popcorn, I kiss him on the lips. Looks to me like Tommy took too many hallucinates. You’re our little boy, our biggest pride and joy, so go on and get some rest, then you will feel the best… I smile. How sweet! I hope we have a boy…
“If it’s a boy I want to name him Tommy…” Bill stiffens beside me and hugs my waist tighter as I grab a hand full of the nice and delicious buttery popcorn.
“How come?”
“Ever since I was little I’ve always loved this show and Tommy has always been my favorite character…” I know what Bill’s thinking… He’s probably thinking that I want to name my baby after his father and that Tommy from the show is just an excuse but it’s not. I real want to name him Tommy from Rugrats.
[^*^*^*^^**********************^^^^^^^^^^^^^^***********^^^^^^^************^^^^^^^^^^]
Snap and roll, I’m out of control… Michelle sips on her grape juice as she grinds up on the guys. Bill has her back. Salvator has her side and Tom has her front. She sips on her juice and then stops when the music does. I want my ass smacked… All the guys smack on my ass with the song and I start smiling. Move move shake shake now drop what your momma said… Oh baby, baby…
Salvator’s point of view
Bill and Tom have their eyes closed when Michelle rubs her hand from my knee to my stomach. Shake it like a salt shaker shake it like a salt shaker. When she rubs her hand through the path again she hits my member and I bite my lip. She winks up at me and I smile. She quickly stops and runs away. Not too long after that I get a text from her saying meet me in the bathroom. I quickly make my way to the bathroom.
I’ll take you to the candy shop… When I knock on the ladies bathroom door Michelle opens it with a smile and pulls me with her in to one of the stalls. I smile as she makes out with me, putting me in a trans as she unzips my pants.
“Michelle,” I hear someone yell. My eyelids flutter open and I sigh.
“What? I haven’t even had time to sleep!” Salvator frowns.
“Sorry… Do you want me to let you sleep?” I moan as he kisses my forehead. His voice drops to a whisper. “I just wanted to thank you for tonight…” I smile and nod. I feel him cuddle up beside me and kiss my cheek. “Goodnight, Michelle… I love you…”
“Love you, too,” I mumble before falling in to a deep sleep. When I wake up the next morning I am alone in my bed. “Salv? Tomie? Billa,” I call out. I feel all three of the guys jump down on to my bed at once. I jump forward with a shock. “What the lemons you guys?!”
“You called for all three of us so it’s your fault we all came,” Tom says.
“You know we’re always here waiting for you, when you wake up,” Bill whispers in my ear and kisses my cheek.
“Always,” Salvator agrees. I smile and pull the guys in for a hug. My stomach twists and I run in to the bathroom throwing up. They run after me. Tom holds my hair back, Salv rubs my back, and Bill gets me a wet washcloth.
“We need to tell my parents that I knocked you up…”
“You haven’t told them?!”
“No! Are you crazy!?”
“Well you are going to be the one to tell them. If you think I’m going to be the one to tell them, you’re a freaking idiot!”
“Why don’t I take you shopping today,” Tom suggests. What? Did he really just ask me that? Since when does he like shopping? I blink twice as he sweeps some wandering hair behind my ear. He bends over to whisper in my ear. “Whatever it is you’re doing with Bill to make you fall in love with him, I want to do it, too…” I freeze.
“You want to date me,” I stutter. Tom nods.
[~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~]
I laugh as we get in the car after a full day of shopping. Tom smiles at me and rests his hand on my thigh. “Are you having fun?” I smile and roll my eyes.
“Uh, are you crazy?! I’m having the worst time of my life!” Tom’s smile fades tremendously as he stares deep in to my eyes. I laugh. “I’m just playing, babe!” He lets out a sigh of relief and smiles at me once more.
“Let’s go to babies-R-us and get something for the baby!”
“What could we possibly get? We don’t even know what we’re having yet!”
“That’s the fun part!” I laugh.
“Okay I’m going to do something but you can’t tell anyone that you are already on the step Bill and I are on, okay.” Tom looks at me with a confused look. He knows the steps but he doesn’t know which one Bill and I are on. I lean in slowly and kiss his lips. When I pull away his eyes grow wide.
“We’re already on step four?!” I smile and nod.. He smiles. “You are so beautiful,” He tells me as he rubs the side of my face. I smile as he leans in to make out with me. After a few minutes I pull away. Tom laughs. I get a text from Bill. How’s the date going so far?
Wonderful! =] When we get to babies-R-us and get inside everything turns to slow motion. It’s like shopping for a teddy bear at build a bear workshop! I smile as I feel Tom grip my waist and squeeze tightly.
What step are you on with him?
He doesn’t know what step we are on so you won’t know what step we’re on. “Michelle, can I ask you a question?”
“Of course!”
“Would you want to live with me? After we reach step five?” I stop walking and turn to look at him. “You don’t have to answer me right now… You can do it later… I just wanted you to know that I don’t mind and I would like that…” He wraps his arms around my waist and we start walking again.
Three months later
“Michelle,” Tom calls from beside me. I moan and turn over on my side.
“What?” I feel the bed shift beside me before I feel Tom creeping over on top of me. I open my eyes to look at him. My eyes grow wide as I grab at his hair.
“Oh my god, Tom! Your hair! Your dreads are gone! They’re cornrows! And it’s black! Why!?” He smirks and kisses my lips as I turn over on my back. We’re only on the fifth step so having him on top of me is still a little weird.
“I thought you would like it better… Do you?”
“Yes! It’s so cute on you, baby!” I let my eyes wonder further down to finish checking him out. He has on a white wife beater and his good pair of blue jeans on.
“Guess what,” He whispers in my ear. “We get to find out what the baby is today!” I smile.
“Is that why you’re all dressed up?” He blushes and I laugh. We decided that we’re not going to move in with each other until after we get our own house so we’re still stuck in the hotel with all of the other guys. Bill and I are no longer in a relationship but he is still a part of my life. Tom rubs my stomach and then his hands come up to cup my breasts for the first time since I have been pregnant. I wince but smile anyway.
“They’re getting so big!” I laugh. This will be the first time we’ll be seeing our baby. We haven’t been at all so we don’t even know if I’m carrying twins or not. I feel his pride stabbing in to the bottom of my stomach and I laugh.
“Are the guys in here?”
“No. They all went down to the lobby for breakfast.”
“I want to watch you,” I say pointing to the obvious issue in his pants. He cocks an eyebrow at me.
“You want to watch me jack off? I wasn’t even going to fix it,” He says with a laugh.
“I think I just want to sleep with you. I don’t want to go through all the steps anymore.” He smiles and kisses my lips.
“Well, we can when I get us a house, okay?” I moan. “Did you know that you were the last person I slept with?” I smile. That means so much to me!
“Awww babe! That’s so sweet!”
“We need to get ready, okay? I have a lot of special news today…” I stand up and stretch. I’m not huge but I’m not small either. Tom can wear my pants from before I was pregnant but I couldn’t fit in his. But now I can.
“I have no clean pants that fit… Can I wear a pair of yours?” Tom smiles and tosses me a pair of his jeans from the dresser. I smile and put them on. “Thank you…” I toss on my white tank top and get Tom’s jacket to put on. I also steal one of his hats. He comes out of the bathroom with dick in hand but after string at me for a few moments and calling my name out he comes. I whine. “I wanted to watch you!”
“I just started! I was really horny and I haven’t fucked in such a long time and when I saw you, four squeezes and a pull or two was all it took!” He wraps his arms around me. “I’m sorry baby… Please forgive me…” I smile and kiss his cheek.
“Okay…” The door flings open and the guys come in laughing and yakking loudly. Tom works fast to get himself back in his pants.
“Can we go,” Salvator asks me. I frown.
“No… Not this time… Maybe you can come next time.”
“What do you think the baby will be,” Bill asks me as he hugs me with a huge smile on his face.
“I don’t know…”
“I think it’s going to be a girl,” Tom tells us. Tom grabs my hand after I get my shoes on and stand up. “You ready to go?” I smile and grab his hand.
“Yeah.”
“Call us once you find out what you’re having,” The guys yell at us as we leave the house.
“We will,” I yell back.
The nurse spreads the cold blue jelly on my stomach as Tom rubs my hand with his thumb. She rubs the wand over it. “Is this your first child?”
“Yes, ma’am. This is also our first ultrasound, too…” Two little balls pop up on the screen. I study it closely.
“Looks like you are having twins…” I look to Tom with a holy shit expression on my face. “Do you want to know the genders?” I nod eagerly as she moves the wand around some more. “Um… You are having… A boy… And… A… Girl…”
